Today is the beginning of the second quarter of freshman year. I am a quarter-way done with the school year. And it doesn’t feel soon, doesn’t feel late. Time seems to moving at the speed of time.
When I was little, I felt like time traveled faster than a moving car. I went by, and I just ran through the days. Life was good; my years were passing by and it felt like soon, it would be summer break once more. I held onto that haziness all the way up to fourth grade. That was the last year I was going to be at that school, with my friends, with me actually being crazy happy.
As I entered into fifth grade, a new school and a new year, time headed for the other end of the spectrum. Days went by, barely. I felt like very class went on exponentially. But after a week, it felt like time had skipped a few beats. Last Monday was as clear in my head as today was. That was also the first year I disliked school. By the end of it, I basically hated it. All I could think about that June was summer. Summer, summer, and more summer. While everyone stopped to savor that last moment in the classroom, I darted out as fast as I could. As scary as middle school seemed, it was the one thing that got me excited for school that fall.
Through the three years at middle school, I made a few close friends and went in and out between friend groups. Every year had it’s goods and it’s bads, and my friends were always there for me. I never got back into that big group of close friends like I had in elementary school. And now, freshman year and with less and less close friends, I come to wonder what would’ve happened if I didn’t leave after fourth grade. Would I still be great friends with that group? Go on to have a lesser education but a happier life? Would I find myself a completely different person?
I made the right decision to go, but I’ll always have this curiosity.